Black Pride
by iMnOtReAlLYcRaZy
Summary: sirius black always wanted to impress his parents yet everyhthing he tried to do went from bad to worse. rated t for Sirius abuse
1. Chapter 1

**Hi! iMnOtReAlLyCrAzY here for ya! I really wanted to write a Sirius fic cuz his life is so sad and depressing and its fun to write sad and depressing stuff This will be kinda confusing to begin with so let me explain. This is a tale of Sirius through school. Starts before school and flashes back. Sirius is abused by his parents. Will get more exciting I promise. I credit JK Rowling to all of this work... I hope that you like it and review….**

School. So close yet so far.

He had one more last minute meeting with his mother before he could go and pack for Hogwarts. These kinds of meetings were normal of course. Sirius was just lucky that his parents didn't punish him as much as other kids were punished. all the kids sirius knew were punished like he was. It was normal wasn't it? his punishments had started ten days ago when his Hogwarts letter came in the post. Sirius had been ecstatic when he read his invitation to Hogwarts. He could go and make his family proud of him for once. He had been so excited that he broke quite a few house rules. Ten to be precise; running, shouting, entering an occupied room unannounced, not being accepted to Durmstrang, jumping, not enunciating, not addressing his mother as ma'am, opening the drapes, leaving before being dismissed, and most importantly and the worst thing he could have done, he let emotions show. Sirius now had to pay for his mistakes to make sure he didn't make them again.

Kreacher appeared right in front of Sirius and sneered. "The mistress wants to see you now!" he cackled evilly before he disappeared again.

Sirius let out a low moan involuntarily. He still remembered his mothers last 'meeting'. Many of the bruises remained on his back and torso as weird greenish yellow blobs. Kreacher had been forced to fix his broken arm but Sirius wondered how far his mother would go this time. Sirius laughed sardonically at the memory of being healed by Kreacher. Kreacher was muttering the whole time about how the only reason Sirius was being healed was because his mother couldn't have a son who looked like he had just been in a fight. Slowly and stiffly Sirius rose to his feet and left his dark room. He would have preferred to remain curled in fetal position in his room but he knew the beating would be worse if he was late.

Sirius went down the three flights of stairs to meet his mother in his parents study. For some reason the house seemed darker and gloomier than normal. The heads of the previous house elves stared at him proclaiming his doom. Sirius knocked on the door and waited patiently for his mother to grant him entrance to the room.

"Come in." came the hauntingly smooth and deceptively calm voice of his mother from the other room. Repressing a shiver he calmly opened the door and strode into the room.

Only to be met with a large volume in the face. Sirius didn't flinch or even make a face as blood flowed from his nose. His mother was red with fury. Standing up she strode over to him and slapped the side of his face. Sirius ignored the sting of the hit and looked at her calmly.

"YOU INSOLENT LITTLE BOY! HOW DARE YOU LOOK INTO MY EYES!" Sirius instinctively lowered his gaze but was again slapped on the other side of the face. "YOU ARE A STAIN TO OUR HOUSE HOLD! IT WOULD BE WISE OF YOU TO GET INTO THE SLYTHERIN HOUSE BECAUUSE YOU ALREADY FAILED US WITH DURMSTRANG!"

"Yes ma'ma." was all that Sirius could say in consent before another two blows landed on his head. Sirius felt one eye begin to puff.

"WHAT IS THE FAMITY MOTTO?"

"Toujours pur. Ma'am."

"WHO WILL YOU ACOCIATE WITH WHILE AT SCHOOL?"

The answer didn't come quick enough. Sirius caught a hit that sent him sprawling across the floor. Sirius couldn't keep the look of fear from creeping into his stoic visage. Righting himself he was bombarded with another barrage of questions. He couldn't help the fear that shone through his eyes which only made Walburga Black even more furious. A slap and an answer was how it continued until Sirius was beaten unconscious by his mother. she left soon after he passed out finding the enjoyment of hitting her son was all gone.

Sirius woke in his own room to be greeted by black bed hangings and a dark room. He laughed in grim humor that his black and blue bruises matched that room. Laughing made his healing ribs hurt though. Apparently his mother was wearing her steeltoed shoes. The room was so dark. He had a window but it was perpetually covered by the gross moldy drapes that his mother loved. He was leaving today for Hogwarts and he still hadn't packed all his stuff from Diagon alley. Sirius remembered that day he went to get his school stuff vividly.

He looked around the alley and almost smiled. Though he had been here many times before Sirius had never witnessed the back to school busty that filled the alley in august. There were so many people all going different places. Entering Flourish and Blotts Sirius saw a whole bunch of people who could soon be classmates of his. Of course he couldn't say hello or anything but he did walk by with a haughty expression and observe all the different families. It was painfully obvious which families were muggleborn because they didn't know what anything was worth or what it was. One family in particular stood out. They were all short, chubby, and blond haired. The boy followed his parents and looked like he was going to wet himself. His parents looked the same way. Sirius sneered in contempt at that. How pathetic could you get? He was pure therefore better than everyone else. His parents told him so and they were always right. Weren't they?

_Entering Gringotts to take out money for Sirius the Blacks spotted another family. The Potters. The Potters were stupid and blood traitors. Sirius was never to be allowed to talk to one._

_"So nice to see you again Mr. Potter." Orion Black practically drawled._

_"A pleasure I'm sure." John Potter replied courteously. Turning to face Sirius directly he queried, "So Young Sirius is going off to Hogwarts I presume?"_

_"Yes which means we must be on our way." Shot Walburga Black before Sirius could respond. _

_"Come it is time to go home." _

_Sirius followed his father out of the bank before his furius father side-appearated him home. _

_The beating followed after. That time both parents were involved._

_"HOW DARE YOU TRY TO SPEAK TO ONE OF THEM! THEY WILL BE IN GRYFFINDOR AND YOU WILL BEAT THEM IN EVERY THING! UNDERSTOOD!"_

Sirius had learned his lesson. He would to get into Slytherin. He _had_ to get into Slytherin. No matter what.

**To Be Continued….**

**Sorry it's so short! Now you can review. Anything is welcome even if its one word. Anonymous reviews are open to the public. Click the button and I'll give you a cookie. (The cookie was someone else's idea. I liked it so who ever I stole it from take it as a compliment or tell me and I will give you credit.)**

**ttfn! **


	2. Chapter 2

**Well I think that it's about time for a round of applause for me don'cha think? I gotta say i am pretty impressed that i was able to get out another chapter for you lovely readers. I will apoligize now for my extremely late update and my lack of brittish slang. I hope you can forgive that. Once again I DO NOT OWN HARRY POTTER. there you go the discaimer. Enjoy!**

Friends and Stations

Sirius had never been to Kings Cross Station before in his life. His parents never took him there, claiming that it was too full of muggles for them. To be fair, this was Sirius' second time ever seeing muggles. The first time was when he had gone to Diagon Alley to get his school stuff. All the hustle and bustle made his spirits rise. He loved being around other people. Unfortunately for him, at his parent's house he didn't get to see much of anybody but his family. The crowded station was perfect for him.

Passing though the barrier at 9 ¾, Sirius turned to his parents so that they could wish him farewell. A Black farewell didn't consist of hugs and promises to write every week like any normal family, but just a firm handshake and a nod. After nodding back to his parents he turned to the train to begin his first year at a school he would learn to call home.

Sirius looked around wistfully at the other families. They gave their kids hugs and kisses. Unless, of course, those people, like Sirius, were pureblood families. They also gave the handshake and nod for departure. Sirius stalked to the train with a blank face, masking his emotions of regret, sorrow, and a whirlwind of other feelings even he could not decipher. He was not allowed to show emotion. How many lessons had he had teaching that? Dejectedly, he continued to board.

* * *

To a casual observer, Sirius looked to be acting haughty and above his station. Marian Potter was one of those people watching the poor child. "James dear, I want you to get a good look at that boy boarding the train right near us."

James' brow crinkled in concentration. "What about him, Mum?" he questioned.

Jon Potter answered for her. "That is a Black, James. A more prideful and muggle-hating family there never was. You'll want to stay far away from that one, James. I work with his father, and like father like son. I can tell you beyond a doubt that that boy will be nothing but trouble for you and any friends you make."

James nodded absently as he watched the Black board the train. He pulled away from his mother as she began to hug him again. "I'll see you at Christmas break!" he called, rushing away from his loving parents. Why couldn't his parents be the kind that doesn't hold for that kind of blubbering all over a lad? James thought skeptically. There were parents who just nodded to their kids and let them go on their way without causing a fuss. _Why couldn't that be me?_ Had he truly delved into the problem at hand, he might have realized that he was happy that his parents cared, but in the sight of all the other Hogwarts students, he would never admit to liking his parents' attention.

James boarded the train just as the conductor blew the departure whistle, shaking his head to clear his thoughts. Looking around, he realized that he was surrounded by other kids. He stayed with the other students as they waved till their parents were out of sight.

Tired of standing by the door, James began to walk around looking for a compartment that wasn't too full. The only one had two students in it. The one looked pale and sickly, but had dirty blond hair and brown eyes that showed intelligence. The other was short and dumpy with blond hair and pudgy features.

"May I sit here with you?" James asked politely. "All the other compartments are full."

"Sure," the sickly boy answered. "My name is Remus Lupin, and this is Peter Pettigrew." Peter nodded enthusiastically.

"My name is James Potter."

"THE James Potter?" the mouse-like one squeaked in surprise and delight. "Oh, I know all about your parents! Your dad and mum work in the ministry, don't they? So do mine! Isn't that awesome?" Peter gushed on about their parents trying his hardest to impress James. Honestly, Peter was jealous of this boy whom his parents esteemed more than their own son. Remus looked on with polite disinterest that came from being muggle-born.

For the rest of the train ride the three talked, comparing hobbies and parents and old school stories. They only stopped talking to eat off the trolley. Soon their compartment was filled with the laughter of good friends who would always be friends.

* * *

Sirius walked by many of the full compartment with a wistful smile on his face from hearing the laughter bubbling out of the other students, sitting, all of them, with friends, new and old. When Sirius had finally made his way to the back of the train, near the prefects quarters, as he had been instructed to by his father and cousins, he was pulled into one of the miniature rooms being held by none other than Lucius Malfoy, Crabbe, Goyle, and Severus Snape. The compartment next door held Belletrix, Narcissa, and a number of their other female Slytherin friends. The split wasn't sexist, it just _was_. No one wanted a monkey made out of their son or daughter in the public sight. What happened behind closed doors was another matter in all of its entirety.

Sitting with a group of Slytherins had its pros and cons, the same as any other group. The main thing that happened when you were rich and evil was that you immediately had every Sytherin in the room on your side. Secondly, you got the best gossip. The downside to that was you didn't know what was fabricated and what wasn't. People mainly told you what they thought you wanted to hear.

So it was for Sirius. He sat in his compartment stoically the whole ride, bored almost to tears. He sat there for who-knows-how-long, listening to people talk at him. The only person who commanded more attention than Sirius was Lucius Malfoy. And for that, Lucius couldn't help but take a dig at the newbie.

"A pity isn't it?" Lucius said, a wry smile on his thin lips. "That one so as fine as Andromeda went to such a waste. Shoving herself into such a pathetic house as Ravenclaw instead of glorious Slytherin. Doesn't matter much, though, now that I have a chance to think back on it. She probably would have disgraced our noble house, the slut."

Sirius' eyes flashed, but that was the only indication that any angry thoughts passed through his head. "I believe you are right, Lucius," he replied without even a tremor of anger in his voice. Ice laced through his words, though, causing Lucius to go stiff as though from fear or annoyance. Sirius' face remained composed as he finished what he had been saying. "Andromeda shamed us. A real pity that her talents went to waste in such a way." Sarcasm was hinted by his tone but was not obvious enough for someone to get upset over. Or so he thought.

Lucius pulled out his wand to curse this young upstart from here to oblivion, but he calmed himself as the train glided to a halt at the entrance of the station. Brought back to his senses, Lucius realized that this impertinent minx would make a fine play toy and would be an asset to his entourage.

Sirius stalked off the train faster than any first year had before. He was standing by the lumbering giant who was bellowing for first years before any other students his age arrived. Severus came and stood by him, acting important. Shaking his head in annoyance, Sirius clambered into one of the boats with as much dignity as he could muster for the preservation of his station. He had to admit the boats were nice for what they were used for. Each of them had padded seats and a little lantern that hung from a crook at the front of the boat.

Looking over the side, Sirius hoped to catch a glimpse of the giant squid that lurked in the waters by the school, for of course he had heard the horror stories that surrounded such tales. As the boats began to glide smoothly and silently across the lake, Sirius could only dare to hope that he would be able to see the monster of the lake someday soon.


	3. Chapter 3

**Hi everyone! hey i know it has been forever and a day since I last updated but I want you to know this story has not been abandonned and my schedual has freed up and I have felt a desire to write so you may be seeing more chapters soon. I used this chapter to enter some of the thoughts of James and Sirius and I hope you enjoy it!**

Hogwarts

Regrettably for Sirius he didn't have much time to ponder about seeing the giant squid for three other students had filled his dinghy and they had begun drifting across the lake. A quick inspection of this fellows showed that these students were most likely mudbloods as he had never seen any of them at the mandatory pureblood receptions that he had been previously been forced to attend. Turning his attention away he gave inspection to the landscape that surrounded the lake he could but only see tree covered hills on one side with the leaves showing the first signs of changing colors and on the other three sides he was enclosed in a fog. So much so that he could only see for about forty feet in any of those directions. Sirius began then to pay attention to how fast they were moving and noticed that he couldn't see where they took off from. An unreasoning terror that they would get lost on the lake made him sit stiffer on the boat than he had before. He had seen the maps of the grounds and knew that this lake was deep. If he fell overboard who would help him?

From up ahead in the fog came a muffled voice proclaiming that they would soon be getting their first glance at Hogwarts castle. Sirius merely shivered not sure how this person could find their way in all the fog. Pulling his cloak tighter around himself he looked up from his internal contemplations hearing a collective intake of breath from the people on his boat. Turning to glare at them he saw that they took no notice all staring somewhere in front of themselves and past him. Bristling at their sight he too looked to where they were staring. What he saw took his breath away from him as if he had been punched in the gut. Hogwarts stood tall in front of him breaking through the mist. It looked pure and ancient. _Like a castle in the clouds. _Sirius thought dumbstruck. His jaw had dropped at the sight of the looming turrets and the multiple towers that made up this magnificent stone edifice. The one good thing his parents had taught him was to appreciate beauty and just now after all his home studies he finally realized what beauty was and it was right in front of him.

So enraptured was Sirius by the castle that he hardly noticed that they had docked besides the slight jolt he felt as the little boats hit the pier. He stumbled a bit as he climbed out onto the wooden docks but no one noticed as they were all talking to their newfound friends. He scowled a bit at this thought for he had not had the chance to make any new friends during the train ride since he had been cooped up with Malfoy and his cronies. The train ride had been nearly hell for him and he, just for a moment, allowed himself to feel a surge of self pity for the fact that he had no friends at this school. He guessed that he had Severus, but then blanched at the thought of calling that greasy haired boy anything close to the term _friend_. He shrugged internally storing those thoughts for later. Anyway he was a Black he didn't need friends because he was above friends and friendships. He thought back to some advice his father once gave him and took it to heart _Acquaintances are fine_ his fathers voice echoed through his thoughts _but friends are altogether unnecessary and tend to beg from you and waste time and money. You will be better off not having any friends Sirius; just acquaintances for they don't require anything at all. _

Sirius vaguely noticed that he had followed the crowd of students off of the boats and into a large entrance hall that he figured could hold maybe two hundred students while he had been wrapped in his own thoughts. The hall was made completely with marble and there was a giant stair well that swept to the floor gracefully. Looking up he could see stairwells extending as far as he could see. To his astonishment and absolute delight he noticed that some of the staircases were moving! An honest smile worked its way onto his face and for a moment he looked like the young eleven year old boy that he was supposed to be instead of the mature young man he was trained to portray. His smile made his eyes shine and for the first time he could have been just any new boy to Hogwarts with unruly short black hair and knobby knees. Amazed at how light and airy this place seemed compared to the fortress that it appeared to be from the outside, he was startled out of his reverie to find a stern looking which in a long green velvet robe with a gold brooch lecturing them.

"…and upon entering you will stand quietly until your name is called. You will then come forth toward me to be sorted." The lady looked sternly over her spectacles at the students making sure they all understood what she wanted. "Am I understood?"

A murmur of consent floated through their small crowd though most all of these new students looked positively terrified at the idea of entering the hall and then waiting to be sorted into a house. Sirius' bowels clenched at the thought of this upcoming test. He wondered briefly if the rest of his family had ever felt this way before entering the Great Hall and if any of them wished they did not have to be sorted into a premandated house. He had to get into Slytherin if only so that his parents wouldn't throw a fit. He was not one to stand up to his parents just for defiance's sake. It would only turn out badly if he did.

These thoughts passed through his head in seconds and he filed into the great hall with everyone else to be sorted into the house that would be his home for the next seven years.

He was pulled out of his reverie by someone singing a song. Sirius subtly shook his head and told himself that he had to pay closer attention to what was happening instead of daydreaming like he had been before. Looking to the dais he was startled to note that the ratty hat on the stool was the one singing. Sirius heard enough to figure that the hat was praising the different Hogwarts houses; the bravery of the Griffindors, the cleverness of the Ravenclaws, the steadfastness of the Hufflepuffs, and the cunning of the Slytherins. In a moment of introspection Sirius felt that no house could really hold him. He was not brave or loyal or smart. And the only reason he would want to be in Slytherin would be to please his parents which made him weak in the eyes of that house. There was an awkward silence at the end of the song before the hall began a weak and sporadic round of applause. When everything was quiet again the lady who had been in the entrance hall began calling the names of the first years to be sorted.

James Potter was thrilled to be sailing across the lake with his new friends. He turned around wildly from his position at the bow of the boat to look at his friends causing the boat to sway wildly and peter to become greener in the face. Who would have guessed that the poor portly boy would become sea sick on such a calm ride across the lake? Peter merely leaned over the side of the boat as if he was about to loose all of the snacks that he had eaten on the train. Remus looked fine at the ride though he was staring distractedly out at the mists that surrounded them as if contemplating some vastly important question that could alter the way the world turned. James decided to leave Remus to his thoughts and Peter to his sickness and contented himself with looking for a sign of Hogwarts in the fog. His father and mother described for him their time in Hogwarts and while many of their tales were highly fanciful he still imagined the castle as something out of a story book or children's tale.

"You will be soon getting your first view of Hogwarts" reached James' ear though the fog and James strained his eyes for his first sight of the magical school. His parent's descriptions did not disappoint at all. James felt almost humbled at the serene beauty and mysticism that radiated from the castle as light does from a halo. The spires rising from the mists wisping across the grounds and lake created and ethereal feeling and suddenly James was struck with a strong sense of foreboding and an itch between his shoulders and he know in his gut that evil things would happen here. He had had these feelings before but usually they told him if someone would be a good friend or if something would happen immediately. This feeling had less of a sense of urgency for it seemed vastly distant as though it would be a long time before any of this came to pass. Still the feeling persisted and James found himself clambering out of his bout feeling distinctly ill at ease.

He trudged with the other students up to the school joking with Peter about still looking green. Remus just walked along beside them contemplating his life. James was going to say something but then decided that he would talk with Remus later and find out what his problem was then as they had just reached the front of the school.

James gazed in wonder at the inside of the castle of Hogwarts. The marble interior of the building was clean and bright and the banister on the grand stair case made him itch to slide down it it was so smooth looking. The sheer size of the building had him gazing with wide eyes at his surroundings. Suddenly self-conscious he realized that he was staring like a bumpkin he glanced around to make sure no one else noticed. He smirked to himself seeing the wonder clearly on every other face in the hall. He started when he notice that generalization extended to even that boy his father had pointed out to him. James struggled to call a name to mind it was an odd name Serious or some other pure blood nonsense. Honestly who gave their children such awful names? All of a sudden a bright smile lit the boys face up and James could not help but smile in response. If his father had not told him that that by was no good James probably would have gone and befriended him right then and there just because of that smile. He began to move toward the boy even so when the boy turned away. It was then that James realized what caught the boy's attention a resigned looking woman was talking to them in front of a large set of double doors.

"…and upon entering you will stand quietly until your name is called. You will then come forth toward me to be sorted." The lady looked sternly over her spectacles at the students making sure they all understood what she wanted. "Am I understood?"

James murmured his consent with the rest of the crowd and wondered just how they would be sorted. Was there a test of some sort inside that he would have to pass with magic because he hadn't practiced any magic over the summer. All too soon he felt the students around him surge forward as the great double doors opened them to the rest of the school. They filed into a disorderly line terror apparent on most of their faces. They came to a halt and James almost ran into the poor kid standing in front of him. He waited for what had seemed like forever while all of the seated students gazed expectantly up at the front of the room where an old sorcerer's hat was seated upon an ornate stool. A rip opened in the hat and in a rusty voice the hat the hat began to sing. James was absolutely enraptured by this song that reawakened that sensation between his shoulder blades.

"_If ever if ever need shall arise_

_These words will someday be seen as a prize._

_As the dark days near and darkness persists_

_Thoughts of working together top the lists. _

_Gryffindor the strong must remember now_

_That working alone to be brave is how,_

_Failure and evil can fester till done,_

_Working together makes us strong and one. _

_Ravenclaw is where the smart are received,_

_Intelligence is easily deceived._

_Logic is not fool proof, remember then_

_Humanity is better than the pen._

_Hufflepuff the loyal to you it lies_

_To be steadfast in all until you die_

_Your camaraderie shall save wizard kind_

_And strengthens those around you in a bind_

_Slytherin the sly with your cunning tricks_

_Your help will aid those in need if you pick_

_the side of light instead of the darkness_

_Your empathy will make this tempest less_

_To work together is to see success _

_Evil rises difficult to repress_

_No storm is ever impossible to sail_

_Your combined strengths will never let you fail" _

A tangible silence filled the hall as the hat fell silent and everyone was too surprised by the song to even discuss the message of the Sorting hat. James resisted the urge to itch his back as the words of the song stuck a chord with his earlier premonitions. People in the hall began to applaud though it was awkward and quickly did especially as the woman who first met the first years in the hall way stood up to begin calling names to be sorted into their houses.

**How was that? I am very proud of my sorting house song and I will explain this new power of James's in later chapter. There are also some very small details that may later become important. See if you can find the important item or if you are seeing only red herings. thanks for reading and sticking with me!**


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